"Write"

In the Spring of 2010 my super-smart-talented-professor-cousin, Angie, sent me an email about an opportunity to submit stories.  She even encouraged me to submit my stories.  I was impressed she thought I was talented enough.

Four years ago I wrote six stories that were published.  They were all rapid fire.  My writing was coming fast and the editors kept publishing my work.  Then I got pregnant, which for me means that EVERY.  SINGLE.  THING.  in my life stops with the exception of trying to stay alive and keeping my children alive.

It has taken me four years to submit another story in spite of my desires.  For the past three years I've had the goal to "write."  Not only did I have the goal, but I kept feeling prompted to "write."

As we do, I ignored, brushed off, and found many ways to distract myself from this prompting.  Mostly in the form of shopping or eating.  Oh yes, and the perfect of excuse of being too busy taking care of my family.

I gained 5 lbs and wasted a whole lot of money just trying to avoid my prompting. 

Until last week.  I had just run five miles.  I was feeling great.  I came home to an empty house.  Everyone was gone, but me.  I used the morning to study, ponder and meditate.  As I began going about my daily tasks of laundry, dishes, checking instagram, facebook and email, I heard that little voice in my head saying, "write."

I had so many great excuses not too.  Instinctively, I grabbed my purse.  Then a brownie.  But something stopped me.  For whatever reason, Monday, April 20th was the day that the excuses stopped.

I promptly marched up to my computer, sat down and thought, now what?  I began browsing the internet.  I started doing some research.  One hour later, as my searching and questions drifted to paper, I had a rough draft of a story.

I was shocked.  How did that happen?  So shocked that I decided to surprise myself some more.  I submitted a proposal to have the article published.  I decided to get back to my household chores, when after just 30 minutes, I received a message saying that my article had been accepted.

I finished the article.  Submitted it.  Less than 24 hours later it was published.

While I'm frustrated at myself for waiting so long, I also know that for whatever reason, this is the right time for me.  I'm excited to continue writing and have set some lofty goals for myself to ensure that I don't stop.

The moral of this story is that if God is telling you to do something.  If he is inspiring you and whispering to you over and over and over again to do something.  He will prepare the way.  He will help you accomplish your goals.

resolutions

It's that time of year.  A time to reflect.  A time to set new goals.  A time to have a fresh start, a clean slate or a "do-over."  Now matter what our past has been like, we have this opportunity to create a new future.

My mind has been swirling with ideas about the accomplishments we've had over the past year and also the exciting times we have ahead of us.  As I look back on my life over the past year and previous years, I see that I really am evolving into someone I want to be.  I'm molding myself into the woman of my future.  Some days I can't get there fast enough.  Other days I'm grateful for the learning moments in my life.  Most days I wish time would slow down and I can reverse the clock. 

I finally got my first blog book published and received it as a gift for Christmas.  My sister was looking through it and in shock asked,

"Do you still do all of this, everyday?"

She was referring to my routines in 2007.  As I took the book from her and looked it over, I was in awe.  I was in awe of the person that I was (or wanted to be) and the person that I am now.  Everything was perfectly planned down to the second.  While I did have some great ideas and formed some lasting habits from those routines, I couldn't help but laugh...hard...at my crazy self!

As I've perused through my past blog posts and thought about my life, I relived my "back to work" stunt that I pulled last year.   Great ideas.  Great intentions.  Right?  Yes, I still believe that they are, but somehow, somewhere I was missing something.  I would start with these wonderfully mapped out plans and intentions, but I would inevitably throw my hands in the air and cry, "I can't do this anymore!"

I can't live up to the perfect standards that I set for myself.  I STILL want perfection so bad that I can almost taste it, but that's the problem.  I get so, so, so close, but never achieve it.  You know why?  IT'S IMPOSSIBLE.  Nobody is perfect nor can be perfect nor ever will be perfect.

 Obviously, I've already made a resolution to, "Just Do It" this year.  You can read all about it in the Deseret News.  I always have the goal to simplify my life, which I also discussed in another article I wrote for the Deseret News.  I was impressed that the editor changed the title to, "This year, try slowing down and enjoy the ride."  I love that, but can I do it?

I've been so conflicted about my resolutions this year and haven't been able to quite pin down what I would like to do.  I've thought about a long list of goals {since I'm really trying to be more goal-oriented as opposed to task-oriented...more on that to come.}  However, I wanted to simplify, right?  I needed something more simple.

As I was doing some reading, I came across a talk by President Monsen, that will be the guideline for my 2011 resolutions.  I loved that it already fit in perfectly with the other resolutions I had already set for myself.

The talk and my resolution this year is, "Finding Joy in the Journey." 

Here are some of my favorite excerpts:

I begin by mentioning one of the most inevitable aspects of our lives here upon the earth, and that is change. At one time or another we’ve all heard some form of the familiar adage: “Nothing is as constant as change.”

Throughout our lives, we must deal with change. Some changes are welcome; some are not.

 I believe that among the greatest lessons we are to learn in this short sojourn upon the earth are lessons that help us distinguish between what is important and what is not. 

If you are still in the process of raising children, be aware that the tiny fingerprints that show up on almost every newly cleaned surface, the toys scattered about the house, the piles and piles of laundry to be tackled will disappear all too soon and that you will—to your surprise—miss them profoundly.

 Stresses in our lives come regardless of our circumstances. We must deal with them the best we can. But we should not let them get in the way of what is most important—and what is most important almost always involves the people around us.

 Let us relish life as we live it, find joy in the journey, and share our love with friends and family. One day each of us will run out of tomorrows.

Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved.

Said one well-known author: “Both abundance and lack [of abundance] exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend … when we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that’s present—love, health, family, friends, work, the joys of nature, and personal pursuits that bring us [happiness]—the wasteland of illusion falls away and we experience heaven on earth.” ⁶ 

Despite the changes which come into our lives and with gratitude in our hearts, may we fill our days—as much as we can—with those things which matter most. May we cherish those we hold dear and express our love to them in word and in deed.

This next year there will inevitably be much change for our family.  Life is always full of stress.  However, I know that I can find joy in the journey, serve more and be grateful for the many things in my life.  I can make 2011 one of the best years of my life...if I can follow the above counsel.

Wish me luck!